How to domesticate a pirate [Fed Square Remix]

by Mark Lawrence

Get used to being caressed by hands that make you feel the same as the rough-hardness of deck timber.

Stand in a supermarket queue and pass judgement. You catch yourself despising a woman in beige three-quarter pants because she has filled her trolley with
interest rates
the car service
defined benefit
and your fabric softener.
And because, when she talks to her toddler, she refers to herself in the third person.

Who wormed the dog?

Else, else, else. There is nothing but else in your head these days, and else is all the language that is left between you and the man who comes home to you each night now in a suit.

When your husband comes out of the bedroom in the morning and asks you a question, grenades explode.

He only wants to know if you’ve ironed his shirt yet.

Will you push your canoe away from the rocks, over the aqua shallows to the navy depths where you couldn’t hear even if someone were shouting at you to come back to shore?

No, the nappies can’t last until Saturday.

The Fed Square Remix by Mark Lawrence is licensed under a CC Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 2.5 Australia licence. It is a derivative work of Danielle Wood’s CC Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 2.5 Australia licensed story. The original is available at http://www.remixmylit.com/storiesremixes/how-to-domesticate-a-pirate-by-danielle-wood/. For details on how you can reuse the original and this remix see http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/2.5/au/